The last few months have been tough, battling morning sickness and then planning a wedding, has left me feeling knackered. I’ve got two weeks till my final (and most uncomfortable) trimester starts. Yay!

The usual things – stretch marks, dry skin and massive weight gain – have so far evaded me this pregnancy. According to most experts there’s little you can do about stretch marks, so whether you get them or not tends to be a result of a genetic raffle. My mum didn’t get them which may explain why I’ve not got them. That hasn’t stopped me from slathering on the Body Shop coconut butter I got for Christmas though.

Hair-tales

Sitting in the waiting room to see my obstetrician at 22 weeks I had a moment -  many of the other pregnant ladies waiting with me, many of them dressed smartly were not bothering with their hair, leaving it long and unstyled. There were very few women with cropped or bobbed hair. Looking at my own mop (which I had grown to put up for our wedding) I decided a trim was in order.

Pregnancy is probably not the time to go for a really drastic hair cut, because it does shed after birth. Trims are good I told myself and used a 25% off Toni & Guy hair cut voucher in Grazia. I also had £30 worth of Toni & Guy gift vouchers to use, so I got £10 haircut. The lady at Bishops Stortford T&G, Dawn – was great. She also recommended a hair style for when I was feeling like something a bit more on trend (a long Gwyneth Paltrow-style bob, but I’ll come back to you on that one).

Now while I’ve made a personal decision not to dye my hair during pregnancy, there is no evidence that hair dyes can cause any harm to come to the baby but as pregnancy is the one time you can get away with going natural, I’ve decided to. During pregnancy you shed less hair (it does fall out after you have the baby) so your hair will tend to look thicker, and increased blood flow which gives you strong nails and that pregnancy ‘bloom’ also means I’m sporting a glossy full mane of hair at the moment.

So I’ve booked in to have another trim just before baby is born, and I may opt for highlights then. Remember if you are wanting to dye your hair when pregnant you will need a patch test first as the hormone flood that is pregnancy can mean you suddenly develop a reaction to hair dye.

If you must dye your hair, L’Oreal have a dip dye kit which means you don’t have to put the dye anywhere near your scalp. I did try this kit before I got pregnant and would recommend you only use it if you have mid brown or lighter hair, even the kit for dark hair can come out looking orange. And backcomb the bit where you want the dye to ‘join’ your darker hair for a more natural look.

Beauty writer ReallyRee has reviewed it in detail on her blog.

For the next three months dry shampoo (Klorane oat) a regular fringe trim, L’Oreal mythic oil and some Elnett  heat protect smooth should keep me from looking like the wild woman of Bishops Stortford.

Skin-tonics

I had my eye on a Clarisonic, but at £150 a pop, that’s not going to be part of my regime any time soon (but I can dream). However on one of my favourite beauty forums I was alerted that  Boots No7 had bought out a version of the electric cleansing brush, the beautiful cleansing brush, for £25, and was available at a special offer price of £15. But even better I could use one of the £5 No7 vouchers towards it. It’s amazing, but don’t use the strong setting, on sensitive pregnant skin it can be a bit strong. Your usual cleanser will do, as long as it’s a water based foaming one.

At night I’ve been using Clarins blue orchid oil and my usual Dermalogica regime. Dermalogica has bought out some new stuff, but as I only started working again this month I’ll leave that treat till later.

When I get the chance I’ve been dyeing my eyebrows and eyelashes with a kit, and have been using my very well used Shavata brow shaping kit (bought in Marks and Spencers about six years ago).

I’ve also got some Cowshed vouchers to use, I’m saving them up for week 38/39 as a pre-baby/last ditch mummy makeover.

Still fitness crazy

Thanks to my trainer Victoria Thompson, via the Bishops Stortford Nuffield gym. She gave me some great preggers exercises which have given me a more toned bum and legs than a six months pregnant is entitled to have. From 28 weeks (or if we have sudden warm spell) I’m upping my swimming and pilates. Yoga is just too sedate for me right now, I can’t do power yoga nor can I do hot yoga and pregnancy yoga sends me to sleep!  I do incorporate yoga stretches into my cool down regime. I’ve had to stop running as my hips are starting to ache (I got SPD in my first pregnancy) but for now I’m feeling fit, healthy and happy. Oh and I’ve been wearing some gorgeous pregnancy fitness gear from SportyBump. I’ve taken to wearing the yoga leggings around the house and out when shopping/doing the school run.

Food, glorious food

Well thank the Lord for Omeprazole, this little daily table means I can eat. I’ve not had any weird cravings – I did in the early stages when I was feeling sick – but being able to eat most food probably means I’m not too vitamin deficient. I’m sticking with the Boots Omega 3 and pregnancy multivitamins as a top up. My indigestion may be making a return soon, so I’m stuffing up now – all healthy food (she says, hiding the Cadbury caramel mini eggs out of sight).

I didn’t use to fall for such products but in the last year has, I have, to put it nicely, started to look a little tired. Not old, not haggard, just tired. That for me was the deal breaker. My lovely creams and gallons of water were simply not enough, so I’ve embarked upon a quest to make myself myself look more refreshed.

So in the interests of investigative journalism I give you my definitive (well for now anyway) anti-ageing or how to look less tired guide.

(By the way that picture is of me – with no make up and post gym scraped back hair!)

The gadget

I was lucky enough to be invited to test the Slendertone face. This device uses electrical pulses to tighten the facial muscles, a bit like a Power Plate but for the cheekbones. While it didn’t actually make my skin any better, it did give me 20 minutes a day when I was forced to sit down and relax. A few times I even fell asleep. You can choose three different settings, I often went for the revitalising setting, which made me look like I’d had eight hours sleep – when I hadn’t. The only drawback of this one, is the price – £250. For results you need to give this little gadget – which looks like upside down headphones, at least 12 weeks, although I saw results within a week.

Exercise

I’m convinced that regular yoga practice, which is aerobic but not impact heavy, makes my skin look great. But I also like exercising in the fresh air. There’s nothing like a run along the beach to make my skin glow. Luckily I managed to go on a press trip somewhere hot (don’t worry – you’ll read about this another time). During my eight day stay I managed six beach-side runs, combined with some resistance work and yoga stretches in the resort’s fitness centre.  I’m not convinced this made me look younger but it did make sure I slept well even through jet lag. Outdoor exercise  rocks!

Botox/fillers

Just to be clear, I didn’t/haven’t had botox, but I was curious. I visited Ruth Eaton. She’s probably the only person I would trust to insert a needle in my face; she’s a nurse who specialises in aesthetic medicine. One of my bugbears – which has only appeared since I started to look tired, is a line on my forehead (which I get from frowning). She assured me that I didn’t need fillers and my skin,  which is very good apparently, would not benefit from non-surgical treatments such as micro dermabrasion.  A small amount of botox would lift my brow and eliminate my ‘tired’ line for about six months. She did warn me that I would look different and to expect the slightly raised eyebrow look which is sported by an alarming amount of women in the public eye.

The facialist

I had my skin mapped at Dermalogica’s store at the One New Change shopping centre in the city. All the products I’m currently using are good, but I was recommended to try a product called map 15 which you add to your daily moisteriser. I took a sample away to test and I did see a slight difference. I also tried Boots No7 famous Protect and Perfect serum. This was just as good, but at a third of the price.

Sleep

This is the killer – lack of sleep makes you look terrible. For the last week and half I’ve had at least seven hours a night. Managing this has meant going to bed at 9.30 and getting up at 5.30/6 which has reprogrammed my body nicely. Long may this continue as I no longer have dark shadows, yay!

Sun

Everything in moderation and for that includes some sun exposure. Having spent all summer plastering my daughter in cream (well when the sun came out) I deicded to work on my own tan while on my trip abroad. The sun cream of choice was Ultrasun. I used the factor 50 on my body, factor 30 on my face and factor 15 lip balm. Not only did the stuff work it smelt good, not perfumed but not too bland either. I didn’t burn, despite spending a large amount of time ooutside, and we were on the equator where the sun is at its strongest. The result is a light tan which was not achieved by sunbathing for hours but my simply being in the sun doing other things. I hate to admit but  light tan on my face makes me look better than a week in a spa ever could. And you can get this effect just by doing the gardening!

The verdict

All these things together have conspired to make me look, but the crunch probably is the tan I’m now sporting is my favourite anti ageing trick. I have to admit that I’ve also overhauled my diet, and opted for more water and regular meal times – not more or less food – just making sure I eat breakfast lunch and dinner. The rest – as they say – is in the hands of God.

Parabens are preservatives, man made ones, and studies that cannot rule out the link between using them and certain cancers. Note my use of the word ‘cannot’. I just wanted to be sure I was doing the best for my my unborn child.

Fast forward a few years – and a few bottles of everyday fake tan later. I’ve not really been paying so much attention to what I use to wash/beautify myself, but Imogen (my daughter) has been as far as I know, a paraben and sulphate free zone; sulphates being another questionable inclusion, as they are  harsh detergents that can strip the body and hair of its natural oils.

It was while I writing a piece on cancer  for one of the financial trades I work for a few weeks back that I became ‘content’ conscious of the various lotions and potions I use. The article, by the way, which happened to mention that women are more likely to get certain cancers in the late 30s through to their early 50s.

So on my next trip to the supermarket I decided to try L’Oreal’s new sulphate free range. The Paris Hair Expertise EverStrong Reinforcing & Vitality shampoo and conditioner which were on special offer for £9 for the both. A bit pricey, but not as pricey as my usual brand. So I gave them a go. The smell was the first thing that I noticed, there were no chemical undertones, and my hair looked and felt better – it was easier to style, and when I didn’t blow dry it, still looked okay.

So I thought try some other brands, this time ones that were paraben free too.  My hair is in fairly good condition, apart from last being cut 10 weeks ago (I’m growing it so I’m holding out for three monthly cuts at the moment), but it could do with a bit of a boost.

First up was Keratherapy’s keratin infused shampoo and conditioner. You can only buy this through hair salons and it’s marketed as a product for those wanting that sleek blow dried look without having to have the permanent blow dry. The smell was subtle and the consistency was something you’d expect from a protein-packed lotion. I didn’t use protective product when I blow dried my hair after using this and it still managed to look shiny. It did also hang straighter.

Macadamia Natural Oils – I tried the rejuvinating shampoo and moisterizing rinse producgts. These were a little runny but don’t let that put you off, they smelt like sun tan lotion and my hair, which can look lank if I use a heavy conditioner, managed to hold its style (I used this on a day when I curled my hair with rollers) all day.

Essential Care – the gentle herb shampoo promises to be so mild you don’t need a conditioner. I have to say I’m a conditioner addict so I still used one! But out of all the products this was the one that didn’t actually smell of anything at all. I used it on Imogen, as she certainly doesn’t need a conditioner, and was impressed. Three days after using it her hair was still looking freshly washed.

Ogario – if I had to go by smell alone these would win hands down. I tried the restore and shine hair masque, which smelt like chocolate and lemon; the revive and shine shampoo and conditioner, which also had a wonderful lemon aroma. I later read that the masque had sage and lavender while the shampoo had nettle and rooibos, while the condition had horsetail and hibiscus. It felt like a waste to put these on my hair and I debated actually tasting them (and no I’m not pregnant). My hair felt soft and was shiny.

Verdict: Giving my hair a break from sulphates appears to have improved its condition generally. These products are not ones I’d normally buy. I’ll be trying some more mainstream brands, including the Body Shop and update you on my findings.

If you have any recommendations let me know and we can include them here.

As a modern woman with her own income if there’s anything I need – perfume, make up, clothes, flowers – I’ll just go out and buy it.

But then when I don’t get anything (which has happened, not recently but it has) I’ll go into a ‘poor me’ strop and start feeling sorry for myself; it’s my own fault for not being assertive enough.

This year I thought I’d be proactive, so I made a list, about a month back. Thing is most of the things on the list have now been acquired – apart from the mini Mac Book pro which I’m now saving up for (at £750 even with my NUJ discount, it’s a bit much to expect anyone to buy me!).

If there is one thing I’d like for my birthday, apart from world peace and the health of Andrew and Imogen, it is look more rested. Not as in younger, what I want is to look and feel like I’ve had eight hours sleep a night for seven nights in a row.

The only way to achieve this – considering I get around 7 hours a night’s sleep anyway – is to try and take better care of me. So that’s going to be my present, to myself. Starting on Monday, my birthday.

Not in a ‘let’s buy a new wardrobe/spend more time in the gym/get a new hairdo/try and be nicer to everyone’ way. For a start that’s expensive and way too much pressure. No this year I’m going to make the best of what I have.

First up, my tired face. A bout of conjunctivitis which made my left eye so red a shop assistant asked me if I had one green eye and one brown eye (anyone with hazel eyes knows that if your eye gets red it can look an eerie shade of green) forced me to throw out all my eye make up – on the basis you understand it could be infected. My friend Amanda will agree with me on this.

But if I’m to buy new make up, I need to know what works and what doesn’t. Thankfully I met up with Moragh Ross, a very well-known film make-up artist. We met up at the Fragrance Lounge in Mayfair (wedding perfumers to The Duchess of Cambridge) at a launch of Slendertone Face (which I’m now trialling – more on this later).

Her rules – and she saw me at my worst – are the ones I’m going to try and adopt:

Good brows – are the best way to frame your face. So get them shaped – natural but tidy -  and if yours are looking sparse make like I am and visit a Bobbi Brown counter for a make up lesson, or any make up counter where you can get expert advice and recommendations on brow pencils (I love my Mac liner) or brow enhancing alternatives.

Good base – a primer to stop make up sliding off. Shu Uemera is one of her favourites. Having a base means you don’t have to cake on foundations which is another no no…

Light foundation – use concealer for under eye circles (she recommends Benefit’s Boi ing) and a YSL Touche Eclat highligher pen to reflect light from wrinkles, then use a tinted moisturiser for the rest, Laura Mercier’s is her go-to product.

So that’s make up. What else can I do to look a bit more zingy.

Well I’m fairly happy with most of my clothes, if anything I need to get rid of a few. I managed to buy an LK Bennett silk wrap dress in a really lovely brown, cream and beige pattern for £30 on eBay, and it is age appropriate, but can be teamed with my Top Shop skinny jeans and trainers on ‘rainy/school pick up’ type days.

That leaves me with my last, but hardest, challenge to looking and being my best self One of my best friends – noting how much I ate and drank while staying at hers the other weekend – maintains that my worrying is the reason I’m slim. But it’s also the reason why I look so tired.

Well I’m loathe to say this but I think I’m going to swap some of my aerobic sessions for yoga. My practice has slid down my list of priorities. Margie Pope, of the Body Studio recommends I start each morning doing a few sun saluations. Which she says is a great massage for the soul. It’s also a great way to stretch and learn to control breathing.

Phew!

She was joking – I think. But my very request should be a warning to all those 20somethings who are over-plucking their brows! Don’t because when you are older you will regret it. Eyebrow hair appears to start thinning at around 30, at least that’s when mine did.

In my early 20s my brows looked like two dark brown caterpillars across my forehead, and that’s the way I wanted them. My brow-speration was Madonna and Brooke Shields who both healthy looking eye furniture that laughed in the face of the 70s pencilled-in look.

That was until the early 90s when it became fashionable to have thin ones again (think of Madonna in her Erotica video).

I tried to resist but at age 23 I went from bushy brows to barely- there ones. And I went from dyeing them black to bleaching them out of existence.

How I wish I hadn’t! But there is a solution, and I think I’ve found it, the Mac Brow pencil. This £11.50 wonder has made me brow proud again, and there’s not a ‘Scouse look. A make up artist at the Brighton branch of Mac showed me how to use the pencil to best effect. I’ve even taken to using this on days when I don’t wear any other make up.

The look is strong but not overdone and I don’t look like I’m wearing someone else’s eyebrows. You can get similar effect by using a dark brown eyeshadow and a brow brush, but I have to admit this pencil is pretty foolproof.

So I won’t have to have mine tattoed anytime soon…

I’m still not ‘that’ grey, according to my hairdresser. She notes that because my grey is more noticeable to me because it is mostly situated around my crown, which is where they catch the light.  The rest of my ‘do is the same pale mid brown shade it’s been since my 20s.

So why am I worried about it now? Well in the last few months I’ve been getting the odd grey eyebrow hair. I don’t mind these, you can pluck them out and they actually look blonde, but for me it’s one grey hair too many.

Of course I could just go with it, but with a three year old daughter, I’m conscious that at the age of 40 I’m one of the older mums at the pre-school gates. I figure I’m probably going to let it all hang out grey at some stage – just not quite yet.

Why grey?

In my quest to make sure I do right by my appearance (and in case ladies and gents out there are wondering what to do about their own grey hair)  I asked Bruno Elorrioroz, a  colourist at the Aveda Institute in London’s Covent Garden, why it is we go grey in the first place.

He says: “Going grey is simply a result of ageing,and at what point we go grey will also be down to genetics.”

So if you mum went grey prematurely, or your dad, then the same may happen to you. My 67 year old blonde mother is still dark blonde and her mother still had some of her brown locks when she died age 88. So nature could be on my side. My dad’s mum and his father both went grey a bit earlier – though no one can remember exactly when.. so maybe not…

Stress has also been linked to greying hair, you can read about it on the NHS website.

What is grey hair?

According to Wikipedia grey or white hair is due to a lack of pigmentation and melanin. Grey hair is actually ‘clear’ and appears as gray or white because of the way light reflects from the hairs. The site also says that  gray hair may be caused by thyroid deficiencies, Waardenburg syndrome or a vitamin B₁₂ deficiency, but you’d need to ask your GP about that.

According to Bruno, grey hair is much coarser in texture than non-grey hair, which if you’ve had a lifetime of fine hair could be a blessing.

So what’s the best way to colour it?

Highlights, which have been my choice of colour, do not guarantee grey coverage. Bruno recommends a permanent colour because it is applied to every strand.

Well on my hairdresser suggestion I’ll probably be going for an over permanent tint combined with some highlights – a t-section which is applied around the parting. This means you don’t get harsh effect of dark/greying roots when your hair grows out.

This is the dilemma freelance journalists such as myself face. Meeting up with contacts – whether or not they are friends – is essential if you are to get story ideas or even good old-fashioned exclusives. But time away from the office (or the typeface) means time away from writing up the stories you have got.

But it’s a little bit less of a dilemma when meeting up with contacts allows you the luxury of having some pampering at the same time.

I very nearly cancelled my meeting with one PR this week, I was stuck in case-study hell, when sourcing someone to illustrate my story on a certain financial product ended up being way more difficult than it should have been.

But rather than cancel I opted for multi-tasking, so while the PR and I chatted, we both had a pedicure and at the same time I managed to source a case study and file my story.

It was stressful but I got three things done, made a contact, filed a story and ended up with pretty feet (in Jessica’s gothic black shade) courtesy of the Sanctuary in Covent Garden, oh and thanks to an understanding PR and pedicurists who have probably seen it all, and worse, before.

This type of networking is nothing new by the way, a few years back I used to do spin classes with contacts.

As an aside, I’ve been sent a pair of Hi Tech V-Lite Infinity running shoes to test.  I’m wearing them as we speak.

They may nearly supplant my Adidas Stella McCartney running shoes, which also look very funky (and glow in the dark), as my wear-anywhere trainer.

In fact they are so comfy I might not even swap into my normal shoes today..

Read more on Ella Mag:

Win a pair of wellies

I have started having dreams about the wedding, about the music going wrong, my dress ripping, and not being able to get to the church.

But this wedding worry seems to have exacerbated something I thought I’d shrugged off  eight years back – around the time just before I first went freelance ; a period when when I felt out of control of everything in my life.  I sorted it out by carving my own career and generally taking control of my life.

I know this feeling – it’s anxiety.

I’ve read several articles on anxiety in the last few weeks. Apparently we’re all are suffering from an overload of anxiety. It’s the new epidemic, according the Sunday Times Style magazine.

Anxiety is something I find hard to live with,  worry on the other hand…

I’m a worrier, in fact I really am one of those people who if they haven’t got something to worry about, will actually wonder why they haven’t got something to worry about and will worry about that. I’ll assume that there’s something I should be worrying about but am not therefore the thing I am worried about will happen/not happen and then I really will be worried.

I was born like this, ask my mother!  In fact I’m surprised I don’t look 10/20 years older than I am.

But worry is something I can control.  Although I’m pretty sure this anxiety is actually my normal worries with the wedding stuff added I don’t want it to get the better.

For me anxiety means having a feeling in the pit of my stomach that there’s something I’ve not yet done or have to do. It can paralyse me in social situations or at home when I’m trying to do something relaxing.

It also means I get headaches – which is not something I generally suffer with much either.

Sometimes life can be a bit too much , we try and cram so many things in. Thinking of ourselves… as well as planning the wedding, we’ve had a quite a few things to deal with in the last couple of years. Serious illness, job losses, debts, changes in employment,  Imogen starting pre-school and a few others.

I nearly had a meltdown this afternoon when we were discussing the honey moon with Andrew’s parents. Then  I remembered how I managed to beat off the anxiety that nearly suffocated me a few years back – learning to  breathe.

You may laugh but while Andrew put Immy to bed I put on my yoga DVD, and rather than fast forward them, I actually just did the breathing exercises on their own instead.  Just sitting still, being calm, being in the moment, and hearing the sound of my own body nourish itself made me realise – everything really will be okay.

Ahhh

Clarins hand and nail treatment cream – we got given this as a Christmas present and forgot how smooth it made our hands and how strong it made our nails.

Aveda’s clove colour conditioner – if you fancy going darker but don’t want the commitment, or just want to cover your roots to tide you over till H Day (highlight day), this does the job. For a deep rich colour leave on your hair for at least 30 minutes.

Johnson and Johnson’s Holiday skin – still the best gradual fake tan for the price and it smells good.

Ambre Solaire sun cream – this stuff is pricey but it smells great, is not too sticky and best of all we’ve not had any red-faces (or bodies) from using it.

Dermalogica skin smoothing (day) intensive moisture moisture (night) - we’ve used the skin smoothing cream since we were 22.  Some two decades  later our relatively line- and botox-free faces are testament to that fact that nothing beats a good basic moisturiser.

Boots salon smooth nail files -  these are basic nail files which are cheap enough not to worry about replacing.

Marks and Spencer cotton-rich full briefs – the most comfortable and attractive granny knickers around, and just £5 a pack (M&S factory outlets)

Now we’ve shared ours, let us know your must-have beauty buys…

With 10 weeks to go till our wedding every minute we can spend planning is a minute’s worth of stress avoided.  I’m not quite reciting the mantra  ‘fail to prepare, prepare to fail’ but…

Being on a budget means looking for some great freebies. As my dress is sorted I’m now concentrating on having glowing skin to match my beautiful wedding dress.  I’m not leaving it to chance, oh no. So after a brief Easter break spent scoffing chocolate and guzzling wine (well sort of) I’m now back on the booze-free, choccy free, caffeine-lite bridal bootcamp plan.

I’m allowed the odd cup of tea (but no more than two a day) – a journalist needs something to get them through deadlines – but all else is banned.  But it’s not sooo bad, surprisingly I didn’t actually enjoy those mini Cadbury Caramel easter eggs quite as much as I did last year, and ended up with a hangover after just one (large) glass of red wine on Easter Saturday.

Keeping to the straight and narrow means spending my lunch hours sourcing budget bridal stuff.  One of my news shifts means I’m based in the City of London a few days a month. Temptation is everywhere, but being broke means I have to be inventive.

Thankfully the Dermalogica shop in One New Change offers a free 10-minute skin mapping service. So I can get my skin sussed out and product suggestions, but there is no obligation to buy. In fact I discovered I had all the right products, I just need to use them more!

(For those of you i.e. most of you who don’t live or work in the City of London you can find a free of charge face mapping service at www.dermalogica.com).

Another find was the Hershesons blow dry bar – for £24 you can get an up do/down do in just 30 minutes and I’m debating whether a trip there might just be worth the effort on W Day.

Sadly this service is not available outside London but you can find a reputable hairdresser on the Hairdressing Council’s website.

Now you’ll have to excuse me, am off to decide what buffet food and drink we are going to serve. Wonder if our guests will be happy with a sausage roll and a glass of cheap fizz?

Read more:

Buff bride on a budget – 10 and a half weeks to go

Buff bride on a budget – my no booze plan